Grief

a raven pecks your heart   takes wing  

returns and returns

a brick thrown through your soul’s window with 

a note attached   I’ll never let go

a corner you round at the intersection of Heartbreak 

and What You Thought You’d Overcome

a sea of rage at the course of life

a God who turned his back   or never was

the keen of what forever means

songs you can’t listen to anymore

half a sandwich molding in her fridge

friends that don’t understand

a teacup half empty on his sink deck

that private language you shared

jokes no one else can get 

a shape in a crowd that must be he

a car she’s driving

a crib sans a future

an instrument  silent   on a music stand

a home that’s become a house

a sweater limp in a closet

a world of poor and empty

Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in The Atlanta Review, The Main Street Rag, Chiron Review, I-70 Review, The Paterson Literary Review, and elsewhere.Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in The Atlanta Review, The Main Street Rag, Chiron Review, I-70 Review, The Paterson Literary Review, and elsewhere.Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in 

Waiting Room Again

The lady with three kids

in the corner of the room yells:

“You want your ass warm?

I’ll beat your ass in front of anyone.

Don’t think I won’t!” She

screams as much for us

as for her doomed offspring.

This fleshy prodigy producer

should have taken a Do Not Reproduce 

pledge, but no luck. “I’ll beat your ass,”

she bawls again, and I find us another 

place to sit, far away from this 

impresario of abuse.

Judy has to get another injection

for the relentless pain in her hips and back.

Her cane keeps a mordant rhythm while 

we move to our new seats only to hear

the lady in the wheelchair by the fish tank

loudly proclaim, “What matters

is that you’re saved. The water 

doesn’t mean a thing. You’re saved

what’s important!” 

They take Judy for her injection and 

I jam plastic buds into my ear canals, 

hoping that Khachaturian will save me

from whaling fanatics and frantic

ferocious Medusas. When Judy returns

we go to lunch at the Regent Square Café.

I have bacon and eggs, she French toast.

The injection doesn’t work, her pain returns,

but the food is good, and the drive back 

made marvelous by the green/yellow gleam 

of sycamores that line our route home.

Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in The Atlanta Review, The Main Street Rag, Chiron Review, I-70 Review, The Paterson Literary Review, and elsewhere.Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in The Atlanta Review, The Main Street Rag, Chiron Review, I-70 Review, The Paterson Literary Review, and elsewhere.Charlie Brice is a retired psychoanalyst and is the author of Flashcuts Out of Chaos (2016), Mnemosyne’s Hand (2018), and An Accident of Blood (2019), all from WordTech Editions. His poetry has been nominated for the Best of Net anthology and twice for a Pushcart Prize and has appeared in The Atlanta Review, The Main Street Rag, Chiron Review, I-70 Review, The Paterson Literary Review, and elsewhere.

Charlie Brice Interview

1.  Tell our viewers a little about yourself.  How did you get into writing?

For years I didn’t know whether I wanted to be a musician (I played drums in a terrific soul band) or a writer, but when my mother got me a Royal portable typewriter in 1966, I sat down and typed out five poems, or at least what I thought were poems in those days. I’d only recently began reading poetry, especially e.e. cummings (still a huge favorite). My heroes in high school were The Beatles, James Brown, and Ernest Hemingway. In college I became a philosophy major. Then my heroes were Nietzsche, Spinoza, and Bob Dylan. This was during the Viet Nam War. I became a conscientious objector and was assigned to Denver General Hospital where I became passionately interested in psychology (I was an orderly on the Psychiatric ward) and where I became passionate with a cute intern in psychiatry, Judy Alexander. The passion never let up! Judy and I have been married for 45 years! We moved from Denver to Pittsburgh where I got my Ph.D. in psychology and practiced as a psychologist and psychoanalyst for 35 years. What’s the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist I hear your readers asking: about $35 an hour (hardy har har). I also love to tell people that Judy drugs ‘em and I help ‘em get over it (but Judy doesn’t find that funny—also hardy har har!). Anyway, I wrote a bunch of papers in my field (I was especially interested in how the relational philosophy of Martin Buber could be applied to psychoanalysis). But around 2007, I started writing fiction. I got a few things published, but discovered that I loved writing poetry. I’ve been published now in over 150 journals, so I guess I found my niche. 

2.  Tell our viewers a little about book that was just released.

An Accident of Blood (WordTech Editions, 2019) is my third book and it was released almost a year ago. Some have seen it as a poetic memoir, but that was never my intention. True, the first section of the book deals with growing up in Cheyenne, Wyoming in the fifties and sixties, and the trials of living with alcoholic parents, but there are sections of the book that deal with political issues, Ekphrasis, nature, psychology, contemporary friendships, literary figures, philosophical issues, and even the art of poetry itself. There’s a lot of satire as well.

3.  What was the inspiration for the book?

In antediluvian days of yore, I took an English course in college. The professor, Bernie Beaver, said something I never forgot. He insisted that “anything can be a poem.” I’ve found this to be true over and over again and it’s probably why I’ve never faced any serious bout of writer’s block. Whenever I think my creative juices have dried up, I simply look around me, read a few lines out of a novel or history book—any book—even the newspaper, sit down and write. In other words, life itself inspires me. I seem to never run out of material. For example, the title poem, “Accidents of Blood,” came from reading a Facebook posting of a friend of mine who is a cowboy in Wyoming. We don’t agree on anything. He’s a right-wing evangelical Trump supporter and I’m a lefty atheist pinko. But my friend Bill described the decline and eventual death of his most beloved horse in such a way that his pain and suffering became dramatically present in my own life. The poem almost wrote itself. All that is to say that I’m constantly inspired by the world around me.

4.  Will you be out promoting the book, if so, where will you be?

I love to do readings and, up until this month, I’ve averaged a reading a month since the publication of my first book, Flashcuts Out of Chaos in 2016. In these days of COVID in person readings have disappeared. I have done a few readings on line and, if you search for me on Youtube, you’ll see me reading poems. I’m especially happy with the reading that’s entitled, “Charlie Brice: Hello Cooped-up World.” My friend, the poet Jeff Kass, wanted to have a series in which poets read their work and talk about their process that he could show to his high school creative writing classes. I loved making that video. You can find it here. I read several poems from Accidents of Blood in that video. I also recently read on Zoom for the C.C. Mellor Library here in Pittsburgh. That recording should be up soon at http://ccmellorlibrary.org/. If you search “Charlie Brice” on YouTube, you find a couple more recordings of me reading my work. Finally, if you check my Facebook page, you’ll see more about possible upcoming readings on line. https://www.facebook.com/charlie.brice

5.  Where can our viewers find your book?

The book is at Amazon and you can also get a signed copy from me. Send me an email at Charlie.brice@gmail.com and I’ll get one out to you for $21 (which includes shipping costs).

6.  Where can we find you on social media? 

https://www.facebook.com/charlie.brice

Nicole Leckenby is the co-founder/editor of The Holiday Cafe. She works full-time at the University of Pittsburgh and she has two amazing boys at home that keep her busy, along with a whole host of other things.  Check out her website leckenby3.wixsite.com/nicoleleckenby

Abstract Theory - Interview

Abstract Theory

 

                                                        Photo credit: Shyan Montuoro

I promise you I will never forget April 16, 2019! Matt Calvetti hosted “The Get-Together” in Lawrenceville, which was a unique opportunity for a few local Pittsburgh artists to showcase their musical talents & artistic skills.  I was networking and selling fine art throughout the event. Whenever Abstract Theory started performing that’s when I stopped dead in my tracks! They had my full attention and nothing else mattered! They were high energy, captivating, no messing around, passionate, obviously talented, and unique! That’s when I realized there is rare opportunities for me to hear local Pittsburgh Hip Hop performers. I am thirty-five years old and I literally can count one other time! One! Which makes me ask why? What can be done to make sure Pittsburgh is giving musicians a proper future? With that being said enjoy the following interview with Abstract Theory!

1. Can you tell us about your background (where your love of music started, how did Abstract Theory begin)?

Louie: My love for music started with my father. When I was four or five, he bought me a keyboard for my bedroom. I set it right in front of the window and play it, terribly and as loud as possible, with the window open. We used to live in the projects so If some of the kids from around walked by I'd scream "Hey, listen to my music". I began playing terribly and as loud as possible. When I thought the song sounded done, I'd look, and no one would be standing there. I laugh quietly to myself when I tell that story cause now people pay to hear me play. I love it. Being so young and knowing I wanted people to hear what I had to say and express musically is a joy to look back on.

Troy: I grew up in Great Neck NY and I feel like my love of music started with my parents. My parents always played music like Led Zeppelin and The Grateful Dead and I love both of those bands, but my world changed when I discovered hip hop. I spent days on end learning rhymes, watching music videos, and interviews. I think being from NY also really influenced me since that is the birthplace of hip hop. 

As for Abstract Theory, we began after meeting through a mutual friend. We literally met freestyled together once and the rest is history.

2. Where do you think the Hip Hop scene is headed in Pittsburgh? 

Louie: I think the Hip Hop scene in Pittsburgh could/is only going to go up from here. But to be honest, it's nowhere near where it should be. That's why we've been working so hard and collaborating with as many creatives as possible to bring it into the proper lighting, so to speak. I know Troy and I speak on this often, but Hip Hop isn't a genre of music it's a culture and a way of life. It's something you live and stand by. Hip Hop is about community and building a path for future generations to lay steppingstones. As far as I see there's no clear end to Hip Hop, almost like a consistently loading video game scenery while walking through an rpg world.

Troy: It’s so hard to say. To start off with there are only about 5 emcees in the city I actually respect. Most “hip hop artists’ aren’t doing the culture justice so by default the culture doesn’t have a proper future. Most rappers are JUST rappers. They aren’t embodying hip hop. Hip hop is a lifestyle, it’s a being, it’s a vibration, it’s who you are at your core. Millvale music fest didn’t even have a hip hop/rap stage last year and hip hop statistically is the BIGGEST genre in the world. I think that speaks volumes on how the city views what we do and the culture we’re apart of. The only rap acts featured last year were the politically safe choices in the city. Hip hop only has a future if it’s nurtured properly. OGs and people like Louie and I need to teach and the young need to study. This culture is founded on peace, unity, and self-betterment. Right now, almost all of what I hear is drugs, material items, and disrespect towards our women.

3. Who are your most influential emcees?

Louie: There's too many for so many reasons, especially the earlier emcees because everyone has their own style, so to speak. Back in the day if you were caught jockin' someone’s style, you'd get the beat down, no if ands or buts about it. Nowadays, everyone sounds the same, everyone has the same autotune, the same look, the same flow, very few are out here doing something creative and different. But out of a list of 10, I'd have to say

1) MF Doom 2) DAS EFX 3) Mac Miller 4) Joey Bada$$ 5) Big L 6) Eminem 7) Isaiah Rashad 8) Mos Def 9) Biggie Smalls 10) Digable Planets

Troy: Slug of Atmosphere (the king, the goat, Rhymesayers is the best label in hip hop PERIOD), Black Thought, Common, Kendrick Lamar, and DMX

4. What do you want your audience to get out of your lyrics?

Louie: I want them to be able to connect, relate, and find solace somehow some way. Or be able to find a new friend just because their fans of us and they start their friendship through that.

Troy: I want them to understand that it is up to them to take charge of their own life. Society will not hold your hand and there are evil forces that wish to suppress us. Take matters into your own hands. Work hard, read, travel, grow, laugh, meditate, eat healthy, and most of all experience as much as possible.

5. I know that you recently did a European Tour!!! Can you describe what that opportunity was like?

Louie: The tour in the Netherlands was amazing. But it left me feeling almost empty inside because I knew I didn't reach my final goal or full potential yet. 

Troy: The tour was incredible. We made so many fans and had so many genuine interactions. We played for a minimum of 500 people a night at sold out shows. When you’re preceding a legend, it can be hard to captivate a seasoned audience, but we did and that felt amazing. We even got the cosign from KRS One and his whole team which was a dream come true. To me that was the ultimate sign that we’re on the right path and will be soon be legends in this culture. 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Photo credit: Pat Bruener

6. Tell us some of your favorite experiences performing live?

Louie: One of my favorites is the first time I performed live with Troy. We actually performed for a few hundred students at PSU. We got to perform our first song we wrote together and a few others. Because that moment was so enjoyable and the crowd payed attention, if I get nervous, I usually think back to that performance. Another is probably one huge tie between the shows in the Netherlands. The people there are extremely humble with an alacrity to learn about you and from you. It makes me feel like I am beginning to reach others and connect with the world. 

Troy: Waaaaaaaay back in the day, eons ago, year 1 of us performing in the city. We played Art All Night, and, in the crowd, there were like 12 middle-high school kids vibing. I jumped in the crowd during one song to rock with them. Louie and I took a photo with them afterwards. There was one show on the KRS One tour where I freestyled with KRS on stage and he gave me props. Under the Bridge Festival which is a grassroots festival I threw with Louie that garnered over 500 people. We headlined since we put it on and just seeing how many people came out to support was incredible. Lastly literally anytime the crowd sings along with us I lose my shit.

7. Any information on any upcoming music from Abstract Theory? Where can our readers find out more information about you guys? (social media)?

Louie: We've been working on a ton of music. We have an album for you and quite a few singles between the two of us that we can't wait to release. We have also been stepping up our game on the merchandise side of things. From lunchboxes to yoga pants we got some amazing designs for the world. We've also been closely working with some of our favorite creatives in Pittsburgh to collaborate on merchandise. Every month or so we will be collaborating with another creative to put out some dope exclusive merchandise in our Digital Pop Up Shop, all of which are only available for FOUR hours each drop. Personally, I'm a fan of having something not many people have, so we wanted to create that idea around our merchandise. You can find the digital pop up shop on our website abstracttheory.net. If the store isn't open, you can find info on when it opens again.

Troy: New project is in the works now, tons of solo work from each of us, when COVID is over the greatest events Pittsburgh ever done seen (laughing maniacally). You can find all of our updates on Instagram @abstracttheoryofficial and you can check out our music on all streaming services by searching Abstract Theory. 

Natalie is the author of The Many Colors of Natalie, a book of poetry.  She holds an associates degree in Specialized Technology Le Cordon Bleu Pastry Arts and in her spare time is an artist and percussionist.

The Golden Coffee Beans

In a certain asphalt jungle lived two peasants, blood sisters; one was poor and one was rich. The rich one went to live in the inner city, built an enchanted manor, and runs a fortune 500. But the poor one, she can barely rub two nickels together. She lives in a little run-down shack in a ramshackle part of the city. Her children would scream and weep because no food could be found in their home. One day she said to her children: “I will go into the city and ask my sister for help.” She came upon the rich sister’s business. The building was as large as a castle with ruby windows, and gold trim along the outside. As she entered this magnificent building everything was covered in marble. When she turned to her left, she saw a giant mirror and a message appeared in flame lettering “go up the marble steps, I am on the third floor, and my office is the third door to your left.” When the poor sister came to the rich sister’s door, the rich sister was dressed in couture “Ah, my sister, help me! My children are hungry and we have not had food for days or clean running water to bathe in or drink.” “Help me around the office, then I will see how I can service you.” The poor sister set off to work.  She cleaned the toilets, made copies, scheduled appointments, and made coffee.” On the seventh day, the rich sister gave her three golden coffee beans and said: “Thank you for your help!” The poor sister ran out of the building and fell to her knees and wept. A rainbow falcon swooped down and grabbed her and took her back to her little run-down shack. When they arrived at her home the falcon gently placed her on the ground and said: “Master, listen to me. Pluck one of my bright red feathers and wave it over the three golden coffee beans. I promise you will weep no more.” The peasant answered: “I have no strength left.” The Falcon replied, “What do you need strength for? I see that you have tweezers, but what of use is it? Take the tweezers and pluck a bright red feather.”

The peasant used the tweezers to pluck a bright red feather from the rainbow falcon. The falcon then flew away. 

The poor sister threw one of the golden beans on her one-legged table and waved the bright red feather over the bean wishing for a feast that her children could eat. All of a sudden, a feast appeared! There was enough food to feed the city! They ate and drank until they could no more. She did not want the leftovers to go to waste so she preserved them as best as she could. Everyone was merry, loud, and sang songs. Once the celebration was over, everyone went to bed.

The next morning came when the rooster crowed, and everyone awoke she thought long and hard for her next wish. The poor sister threw the second golden bean on her one-legged table and waved the bright red feather over the bean wishing to have a business right next to her rich sister, so she too could wear couture and be successful. A horse with a rainbow mane waited for her outside her little run-down shack. She jumped on the horse and they took off for the city at a rapid speed. She came upon her new business. Almost identical to her rich sisters. The building was large as a castle with diamonds for windows, and gold trim along the outside. The horse with the rainbow mane turned and said: “Master, listen to me. Go through the diamond-encrusted door, then make your way up the marble steps. Go to the third floor, your office is the third door to the left.” She reached her office and fell to her knees and wept. Three little mice all dressed in couture came running to her carrying a giant book and said: “Master, listen to me. Read this red leather-bound book. I promise you will weep no more.” The mice then scurried off. She opened the book and started to read. It was an instruction manual on how to build a successful fortune 500. When she was done reading, she built a plan on how to operate her own business. She became twice as rich as her sister. 

After some time, it was more of a long time rather than a short time she kept monitoring the funds of the business to make sure her empire was in the black rather than the red. This calls for a festivity! She ran over to her sister’s office and invited her for a celebratory feast! The rich sister said to her “I accept the invite, but where did you get the money to build such an empire? Just a few months ago you were begging me for work.” “Ah, sister it was the golden coffee beans you gave me.” 

The rich sister began to worry as she noticed her funds after some time, it was more of a short time rather than a long time were drastically plummeting into the red rather than the black. She had no idea that her sister was taking away from her business and it was due to her reason. She refused to live a restricted lifestyle. The next day the rich sister drove her Porsche to the celebratory feast. There was plenty to eat and drink! The rich woman was jealous, she thought to herself: “If I find that last golden coffee bean then I can destroy my sister fully.”  The dinner has ended, as the guests began to rise from the table, and thanked the hostess. The guests were singing a drunken song as they left the lavish restaurant. The rich sister offered to take the poor sister home. As they arrived at the little run-down shack the poor sister offered the rich sister to come in. When the poor sister had her back turned the rich sister noticed a shiny glow coming from the coat pocket that was hanging near the door they entered. The rich sister grabbed the last golden coffee bean, threw it on the one-legged table, and waved her hands and said: “I wish you to be rich no more.” Both sisters were startled. The rich sister stormed off due to frustration. The poor sister grabbed the golden coffee bean and placed it under her pillow, and went to bed. 

The next morning came and the rooster crowed, and everyone awoke. She thought long and hard for her next wish. The poor sister threw the third golden bean on her one-legged table and waved the bright red feather over the bean wishing to have a handsome prince to love and marry. A few seconds later there was a loud knock at the door. The girls jumped and shrieked and they all rushed to the door. A handsome prince awaited with a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and beautiful dresses for all the girls. The prince got down on one knee and asked for the poor sister’s hand in marriage. She wept and screamed “YES!” As the prince was ready to sweep his new fiancé off her feet, she said wait “please, take me to the city. I have to make things right with my sister.” The handsome prince obliged, and the girls followed behind. As they approached her sister's business it no longer looked shiny and new. As she entered the building the marble looked dull and dirty. She ran up the marble steps to the third floor and barged into the third door that was to her left. There, her sister laid disheveled and distraught. The poor sister said to the rich sister: “Ah, my sister, here is an invitation to my wedding, here are the keys to my business that I no longer need, and here is the bright red feather that I plucked from the rainbow falcon that would have made your wish come true.” She turned and walked away. 

The prince then whisks his future princess away. After some time, it was more of a short time rather than a long time the wedding ceremony had taken place. All the guests wore lavish clothes, the women wore lavish gowns with fur coats, and diamonds are pearls draped the fine couture. The men wore expensive tuxedos and their shoes glistened. Savory dishes were served along with several meads and wines. 

The rich sister ran into the poor sister, both sang a celebratory song, they both lived happily ever after.

Natalie is the author of The Many Colors of Natalie, a book of poetry.  She holds an associates degree in Specialized Technology Le Cornon Bleu Pastry Arts and in her spare time is an artist and percussionist.